Thursday, January 12, 2006


My mind is constantly asking questions. They are questions that I cannot answer on my own. Most of them, anyway. My most recent recurring question is this: "What am I supposed to do with my talent?"

I love music. I love to sing, play guitar, and write songs. Writing songs allows me to tell people something that I just can't say outright. They are messages that I believe are given to me from God. I have these talents, and yet I am completely lost as to what I am to do with them. I told myself a long time ago that I was not going to be a professional music artist. The life itself did not appeal to me.

I'm so excited about teaching. I am almost certain that God has called me to be a teacher. The question revolves around how I can use my musical talent when I have become a high school teacher and hopefully soccer coach. We are given gifts by God to be used for His glory. Sometimes it is just unclear how to do so.

Like most people, I find it so difficult to just hand the reigns of my life over to God. His hands are the only ones worthy (or truly capable) of holding them. Why is that so hard to do? It should be the easiest thing in the world, considering it makes the most sense. He created us; he is the only one that deserves to be first in our lives. Who am I to be in control of my own life? All I will do is make a mess of it. That's all I have done so far. If I would just let go, things would be much less complicated. Things might not get better, but it would be so much easier. Now I'm just rambling....

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